Leading up to the 1980s, the United States was slowly
sinking into a wussified nation.
Militarily, after leading Allied victories in the two World Wars the USA
fought to a draw in Korea and then pulled out of Vietnam in a humiliating
upset. French Indochina/Vietnam was a
35-1 underdog when the USA entered the fray after the French (not surprisingly)
ran away. American society was weakened
by drug-fueled hippies who believed in peace and love but not showers and
jobs.
The entertainment industry also worked to further the
pussification of America. No doubt, the
closet Communists that Senator McCarthy did not get around to exposing in the
1950s still yielded influence in Hollywood.
A production that such people no doubt used to put fear into Americans
was the 1983 miniseries The Day After. The miniseries portrayed what life would be
like after a nuclear war devastated the country. Former Hippies, now called Yuppies but still
dip-shits, and their pussy families were struck with fear at what might happen
if the “mighty” Soviet Union attacked.
In 1984 popular crooner Bruce Springsteen released a song
called Born in the USA. The song explodes with a catchy hook and
rocketed up the charts. The 1984 Reagan
re-election campaign even used it as a theme song until Springsteen and his
lawyers told them to stop. On the
surface the song sounds like it might be a patriotic anthem to unite the
country. However, if you actually listen
to the lyrics it is about a disillusioned Vietnam veteran who returns home to a
rough life. Hardly the stuff of great
patriotism or something that might turn the tide of the Cold War.
Speaking of the 1984 presidential campaign, Reagan’s victory
was vital to winning the Cold War.
Fueled by a slightly improved economy along with an impressive medal
haul from the Commie-free Los Angeles Summer Olympics, Reagan won a close
contest against Walter Mondale, 525-13 in the Electoral College. Mondale got double digits! What comes after that? Triple digits then after that, victory. This was vital because as an alternate
reality with Mondale as president would not have been pleasant. In the alternate reality, on day 47 of a
Mondale presidency the United States surrendered to the Soviets:
So the stage was set.
Reagan was re-elected but still needed something—a spark, someone to
enable him to pursue policies to defeat Commies and dictators. Someone to provide hope to all
Americans. That someone would be the
most important person of the 1980s, a giant among men—superstar pro wrestler
Hulk Hogan.
In 1985 Hulk Hogan was on top of the professional wrestling
world as the champion of the then World Wrestling Federation (WWF). To win the belt, he had defeated the hated
Iron Sheik, striking a measure of revenge for the Iran Hostage Crisis. Hogan encouraged the youth of America to take
their vitamins and say their prayers but he stayed out of the political
arena. The WWF did not want its most
charismatic performer to make waves and offend fans by supporting a cause or
political party. However, Hogan knew his
influence could assist in the fight against Communists but needed a way to
throw his hat in the ring without ruffling feathers. The method he would use to do this would be
through a song he used for his ring entrances.
The song, Real
American, was written and performed by rock music veteran Rick Derringer
and was originally meant to be used as the ring entrance music for a WWF tag
team, US Express. However, when a
wrestler from the US Express team left the WWF it was Hogan who took ownership
of the song. The lyrics illustrated
perfectly the beliefs of Hogan—he was a real American and fought for the rights
of every man. Except for Commies, and
probably gays (it was 1985), and women are not really mentioned either. But nonetheless Hogan would not stand idly by
if Commies were to ever infringe on the rights of his fellow Americans.
With Hogan’s support for the country, Reagan was emboldened
to pursue policies to weaken the influence of the USSR and other dickheads around
the globe. In April 1986 the United
States bombed Libya in retaliation of that nation’s support of terrorist groups. In June 1987 Reagan challenged Gorbachev to
tear down the Berlin Wall. The Soviets
were shaken; Gorbachev had no choice but to implement Glasnost policies, which
pretty much admitted that their way of life was not as good as the USA. By 1991 the Cold War was over and the Commies
had lost.
Fueled by Hulk Hogan and the perfectly matched song, the
United States was able to triumph in the Cold War. Only time will tell if Toby Keith’s ‘boot in
their ass’ song will do the same with the War on Terror.
Lyrics of Real American
I am a real American, Fight for the rights of every man,I am a real American, fight for what's right, fight for your life!
When it comes crashing down, and it hurts inside,
ya' gotta take a stand, it don't help to hide,Well, you hurt my friends, and you hurt my pride,
I gotta be a man; I can't let it slide,
I am a real American, Fight for the rights of every man,
I am a real American, fight for what's right, fight for your life!
I feel strong about right and wrong,
And I don't take trouble for very long,I got something deep inside of me, and courage is the thing that keeps us free,
I am a real American, Fight for the rights of every man,
I am a real American, fight for what's right, fight for your life!
Well you hurt my friends, and you hurt my pride,
I gotta be a man; I can't let it slide,I am a real American, Fight for the rights of every man,
I am a real American, fight for what's right, fight for your life!
I am a real American, Fight for the rights of every man,
I am a real American, fight for what's right, fight for your life!
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